Ever have those times that you can stop and see how your life could have turned out so differently had God answered a prayer? You know the type of prayer that I am talking about, the kind that you are pleading for him to jump in and intervene and give you what YOU so desperately want.
Yesterday I received a call from a young lady that very well could have been me, had God not stepped in and pulled me away from my old life. The voice was so frail and weak and I could tell that the story that she was telling me was like a rerun for her. Just a different situation but the same life, the same problems, the same addictions. As I listened to her pour her heart out to me, a complete stranger, I thought, Lord thank you for not answering the many prayers that I sent up over 18yrs ago. Thank you for rewriting my story and opening my eyes to the man that you had destined me for & closing my eyes to the man that this girl is hurting over.
I remember the day that I met Tony, I was 18yrs old and saw the guy that I just knew that I had to have. He had been coming in the store that I worked at for about a week but all of a sudden, something sparked & we started talking and before I knew it, he was living with me which only took a matter of 3 days. My life changed, the two roommates that I had moved out pretty quickly and the two of us were inseparable.
Over the next 5yrs I prayed that God would keep us together. You see, we started out as friends, best friends and we went back and forth with it being best friends to friends with benefits, to it being that we knew that we "loved" each other but something always got in the way. I am sure that it was the GRACE of GOD now!! whew!! Tony introduced me to just about every hard drug there was and we were constantly on something. My family begged me to leave this life, my friends told me how different I was and most left. I even had a friend named Tommy, that convinced me to leave that life and to move to Houston to go to college and I did. After about a month, Tony moved to Texas with me and I ended up getting back on drugs and flunking out of school.
The stories go on and on and I was reminded of this life as I heard the familiar voice on the other end of the phone. I had never talked to her before but I knew her story, it sounded a lot like my stories from years back. She said he had talked a lot about me, so she even knew some of my stories and maybe that is why she felt so comfortable with me.
Out of privacy, I won't go into private details of what she shared with me but I will share why she called. I had first contacted her because I saw on facebook where Tony had posted that he was going to jail and I was curious as to why, I was curious if his life had changed any at all. I will say though that I believe that God ministered to her during our call. I gave a hard word that I believe she was able to "hear" because it was coming from someone that made it out of that life, made it out of her very shoes. I am not sure if she will take drastic measures to walk away from that lifestyle but I do believe that a seed was planted. I gave her resources to ministries that could help her and I prayed for her as well.
I guess I should add that in both hers and my stories with Tony, it wasn't always him. In both cases, he had gone to rehab many times and when he would get out, great intentions were set but HE had gotten help she & I hadn't, so at times the girl in his life lead him back into drugs as well. I just didn't want to paint him to be this horrible person. He isn't a bad guy, he is just someone that needs healing from his addictions and that won't happen until he allows God to do a complete work in him.
God didn't answer my prayers about Tony because he knew that Mike was still out there for me and I can't finish this sort of blog without bragging on my husband Mike. After I was finally over Tony, I dated a few different men but honestly they were just men that helped me "get over" Tony. When I met Mike, he spun my world in a totally different way, in a better way. I remember when he would call me, I would think, "this guy REALLY adores me". He was so different, that he didn't even bother to kiss me for 2weeks after we met. I had never met a guy that treated me so special. His face lit up when he saw me, he would smile from ear to ear. He was sent by God, he loved me from day one. Mike was the answer to my prayers and as I listened to that familiar fragile voice of this girl, all I could do was respond with, God loves you and he wants to restore your life and the story that you are telling me, isn't what God has destined for you. God spoke life into her and also used her story to remind me of where I came from and how much GOD has always been FOR ME!!
So today, I am one girl that is thankful that God didn't answer those prayers with who I thought was the right man for me, he just shook his head and said....
Jeremiah 29 :11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
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